Thursday, November 15, 2007

No. 59, Lorong Raja Udang 1B


This is no. 59, Lorong Raja Udang 1B.

These are the fabulous people that live in no. 59, Lorong Raja Udang 1B.

And one very fabulous stray cat turned house cat.
This is Cat (pronounced the same way you pronounce paint in malay).

(left to right): Kim, Bee Siah, Yasmin, me, Mei Kuan


The Landlady

The Room Mate

The People From The Other Room

Yasmin and Bee Bee and Cat.
Cat doesn't like cuddles. They had to catch her to take this photo.



Monday, November 12, 2007

Dear baby,

This song is for you.

I feel like a song without the words
a man without a soul
a bird without its wings
a heart without a home

I feel like a knight without a sword
a sky without a sun
because you are the one

I feel like a ship beneath the waves
a child that's lost his way
a door without a key
a face without a name

I feel like a breath without the end
and everyday's the same
since you've gone away

I got to have a reason to wake up in the morning
you used to be the one to put a smile on my face
there are no words that can describe how I miss you
and I miss you

I'm never gonna leave your side
I'm never gonna leave your side, again
still holding on
I won't let you go
cos' when I'm lying in your arms
I know I'm home

They tell me that a person can lose his mind
living in the pain
recalling times gone by
I'm crying in the rain

You know I've wasted half the time
and I'm on my knees again
till you come to me

I got to have a reason to wake up in the morning
you used to be the one to put a smile on my face
there are no words that can describe how I miss you
and I miss you

I'm never gonna leave your side
I'm never gonna leave your side, again
still holding on
I won't let you go
I lay my head against your heart
I know I'm home

I'm never gonna leave your side
I'm never gonna leave your side, again
still holding on
I won't let you go
cos' when I'm lying in your arms
I know I'm home.

love, joyce.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

It's Nice

"..hearts are worn in these dark ages,
you're not alone in this story's pages.."

Dear lonely isle,

Sometimes when the world feels so cold, it's nice to know someone still watches out for you.

It's nice to know that when you have nothing left to eat but maggi, there is still some place you can go where someone will cook specially just for you. And no, I'm not talking about ordering food at a stall. For this person, the only currency accepted is friendship.

It's also nice to know that on days you feel like nobody cares, someone still cares enough to remind you to drink water, rest more, sleep early and to eat dinner. And that if that person was told that dinner was somehow conveniently yet again 'forgotten', someone will have a lot of answering to do.

It's also nice to know that you're always welcomed some place, and you can come anytime so as long as the person who welcomes you is home.

It's a nice feeling to have, on days you feel like the stupidest person alive when someone cares enough to boost your confidence by telling you that you're already the best, so it's okay. Especially when you have a memory so short you're on the verge of having amnesia.

It's a nice feeling inside when someone remembers you're the one who sleeps at odd hours and will most definitely oversleep and skip breakfast, and so makes you a sandwich that morning to eat in class.

It's nice when someone cares enough to run from the lecture halls to pass you some Panadols when you're in another faculty because you're having a headache and need some relief. It's even nicer when that person offered to. And reminds you not to drive home alone in your state of pain and tiredness lest you drive into a tree (if you're lucky). And asks to be notified when you have reached home in one piece, whole and unspoiled.

It's nice to know someone like that.

I know, because I do.

love, joyce.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Upside Down Girl

"...upside down, bouncing off the ceiling,
inside out, stranger to this feeling,
got no clue what I should do

Dear lonely isle,

My time is all topsy turvy these past two weeks.

I sleep at 6-8am in the morning, and wake up at 2-3pm in the afternoon. And practically don't sleep at night.

Result? Panda metamorphosis picking up where it left off.

Still on the journey to eventually become a very cute, cuddly and endangered mammal on the verge of extinction because it was too picky.

Can just imagine mothers telling their children somewhere in the not too off future, "Don't be picky on food, remember the panda? You don't see anymore right? Picky some more la.."

Seems like a very grim and bleak future awaiting me. >.<" Been trying to avoid this unseemly fate by taking a late nap then sleeping through till the next day. Plan failed. the next day, even after waking in the morning, I somehow still end up sleeping at 6.30am.

Everyone keeps asking me to be abit more normal. Believe you, me. I'm really trying.

And it's rather horrifying in a way because it seems to me that I cannot turn my time back to what the general population considers to be normal. Yes, I am turning into a minority. I am becoming one of the abnormal. >.<"

Since I live outside the boundaries of normality at the moment, I guess I have to make the most of it.

Maybe abnormal human-turned-pandas don't go extinct...

I hope.

Love, joyce.


"...though I've tried, fallen,
I have sunk so low,
I've messed up, better I should know

Dear lonely isle,

I like the song Fallen by Sarah McLachlan very much. Above all, it teaches me humility. Somehow, like the song title, I have fallen down many, many times. Must be the two left feet. I keep tripping up myself.

But the most important thing is to get up, is it not?

But getting up is a lot of hard work. Hell, half the time I fall down just trying to get up. But enough is enough.

Had a look a my blog a week ago, couldn't be more ashamed of myself.

Because when provided with nothing, the human need will drive you to go all out of your way to find it. But when presented with luxury, everything you have you take for granted.

Because even though I had to wake up at 6am on Fridays to use the library back last year, I did. And even though I had to starve myself to use it (can't leave my laptop alone in the library to go for lunch, because the line will be too packed to use when I come back. don't worry, I eat maggi on Friday mornings for breakfast), I still did.

Because even though the line was at neck-breaking slow speeds (you break your own neck out of frustration) it would be faster to send an email by snail mail or personal delivery, I still persevered.

Because even though I had to retype all my blog entries at least 5 or 6 times before blogger would get through, I did. And I did it almost every week.

Because even if it meant skipping dinner to use the hour I have to spare in the library to email my baby, I did.

And because now I have internet a few houses away and I don't use it.

Because I can drive to a friend's house to use her internet and don't do it.

So yes, I am just so ashamed of myself.

There's a lot of things that I saw in my former self just two semesters back, that I don't see in myself now. And I couldn't be more ashamed.

and I really wonder where did that girl go?

I tried so hard to kick myself in the head. Wish I could detach my leg and do it. Nothing quite captures the essence of kicking your own head for being such an ass. That belongs at the other end of the body. The confusion has to be corrected.

My To-Change-What-I-Cannot Accept List has just gotten a lot longer this past couple of weeks.

My To-Accept-What-I-Cannot-Change List still has only a single entry. And I think that will be the hardest of all.

But still, better late than never, no?

And better now, than not at all, is it not?

love, joyce.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

There's Just Some Things..

Went shopping in KK last weekend with some coursemates...

There's just some pictures I have to take...

and there's just some things I have to buy...

it's more than a photo frame.

Opens up into a neat box :)
Chased down the owner of the shop to ask about this box >.<"
Yeah, I REALLY like it...

Hehe :P

Baby Came To Visit (again) =)

Baby came to visit :)

(That is not my handwriting by the way...*cough* *cough*)

He watched me study for my molecular genetics mid-term...
(Yes, T_T stupid mid term when my baby is around T_T)

He watched me complete my lab reports...

He followed me to class...
Had an exam on Saturday. (stupid lecturer)

We went shopping =)

on Monday...

I drove him to the airport and watched him leave..

I miss you :(

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Family day at Tanjung Aru about 2 weeks back.
Yeah, I don't know what happened either, the photographer was more interested in the grass instead of us.

What's the fun of going to the beach if you don't get wet? :P
6 dripping girls = picture!

Been frequenting the laboratories a lot lately.
Don't ask.

Future biotechnologist?
It's just simple streaking actually.

Yukata fitting session last week.
Bee Bee and me.

I don't know why they put the umbrella next to everyone sitting down.

Ja ne! :P

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Stupid Girl

Dear lonely isle,

Sometimes I just feel so tired.
Tired of everything.
It's only the beginning of the semester, but already I'm so tired.

I'm in trouble, aren't I?

Maybe it's the weather here, or the food. Maybe it's something in the air, the hazy breeze of emotional lethargicity.

Maybe it's just because I'm here.

Sometimes I just push myself so hard or torture myself, so that I'd have something to suffer about. Something to be miserable about.
Because I shouldn't be this miserable. I shouldn't feel like I'm suffering.

There's nothing suffering here.

Not the food. Or the studies. Or the living conditions.
Not the people. Or the weather. Or the god damned everything else.

Yeah, you realise it too.

Let's just keep it between us okay?


love, joyce.

Take me home.


I was there on the day
they sold the cause for the queen
and when the lights all went out
we watched our lives on the screen
I hate the ending myself
but it started with an alright scene

it was the roar of the crowd
that gave me heartache to sing
it was a lie when they smiled
and said "You won't feel a thing"
and as we ran from the cops
we laughed so hard it would sting

if I'm so wrong
how can you listen all night long?
and will it matter after I'm gone?
because you never learned a god damned thing

you're just a sad song
with nothing to say
about a life long wait at a hospital stay
well if you think that I'm wrong
this never meant nothing to you

I spent my high school career
spit on and shoved to agree
so I could watch all my heroes
sell a car on TV
bring out the old guillotine
we'll show 'em what we all mean

if I'm so wrong
how can you listen all night long?
now will it matter after I'm gone
because you never learned a god damned thing

you're just a sad song
with nothing to say
about a life long wait at a hospital stay
well if you think that I'm wrong
this never meant nothing to you

My Chemical Romance

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

My House

This is the front of the house.
Yes, yes, will take a better picture of it next time. Just felt embarrassed to be standing in front of the house on the street taking a picture. >.<

The living room!
A bit messy, but kind of cozy once you settle down. We have Astro, you know? :)

The kitchen.
Haven't ventured into cooking there yet, except maggi and boiling water.

More kitchen.
We have a refrigerator, I just haven't put anything of mine inside yet =P
The landlady is a lecturer at UMS. She's a lecturer in the food science faculty. We can't simply eat her stuff in the refrigerator, some are her lab specimens >.<

Dr Yasmin's (the landlady) study.

Dr. Yasmin's room.
I have not been inside before >.<

The upstairs bathroom I share with my housemates.

I invite you to carefully observe that that is a sitting toilet :D

My room, my bed.

My study desk, with the towel rack behind it and my bed behind the rack.

My roomie's study desk, next to mine. With a window view.
Overlooks papaya trees. Not my cup of tea.

Roomie's bed, with the bookshelf in front of it.

My cupboard.
Roomie doesn't have a cupboard yet. She's living out of her luggage.


Settling in already.

The Dawn Of a New Semester

Dear lonely isle,

Okay, so the problem with my minor was fixed by changing minors. Pretty unimpressive, eh?


So, what's new in Sabah?

Hmm, moved into a new place, no longer staying in the hostel, which can only mean 2 things:
1. No more hills.
2. No more sucky hostel food :D

Next up, new room mate. Chinese girl, 3rd year senior. We call her Kim.
Will upload pictures in the next post =)
First I gotta take the pictures.

Got myself a landlady, 3 housemates and 5 cats.
I've only seen 2 of them so far. And already I can't stand em.
They wouldn't let me eat in peace, what with jumping on the table and onto my lap when I'm in the chair.
And I was talking about the cats.

Sitting toilet in the bathroom :D

There's internet :D
Which is available either 4 houses away through the JAKMAS (stands for something, I don't know what) wireless, or broadband 2 rows away courtesy of my good friend Tiing Jen. The girl is a blessing.

What else?

Can't think of anything at the moment.

love, joyce.

Monday, July 09, 2007

What I Did On My Holidays

All the people I miss.

Went Singapore.

Met up with Shima.

Curled my hair.

Played with Ichigo.

Did a puzzle with Ziggy.

I miss you.