Christmas Medley

"..I'd like to make myself believe,

that planet earth turns slowly,

its hard to say I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep

because my dreams are bursting at the seams.."

Dear lonely isle,

Is it odd to be so very tired at the end of the day but feel completely satisfied?

Is it odd to wake up feeling so tired but at the same time so ready to face the new day?

Is it odd to wake up smiling?

"..got this feeling that you can't fight,

like this city is on fire tonight,

this could really be a good life.."

Is it odd that I'm so happy?

Perhaps its just the start, maybe I'm not worn out yet.

But I should be, yet I don't feel so.

I remember the days I had during my practical, and how different they were, despite the fact that I had more sleep, and lesser working hours, and much lesser workload.

I remember dreading to wake up every morning.

I remember dreading to go to work.

I remember dreading being at work.

While I'm convinced that everything is light and airy because its new, I can't help but to feel that something is different.

I don't know if this is a new perspective that I'm adding to the list of things that define me, or if its the false promise of the shiny new.

Even if it is, it's holding up so far, and I've really never been happier.

What I do know though, is that I'm definitely in way over my head, and paddling further and further away from the shore. Consciously.

"..suddenly I'm in too deep to ever get out,

I gave you my heart and soul to keep,

don't give me your doubts,

I'm in over my head and its scaring me so.."

If this is what being in too deep is, I'm ready to dive head first.

I know its not too late to turn back yet, but I have only eyes for straight ahead.

There's some things I realized that I can't lose.

Now that you've made your bed, you're gonna have to lie in it.

Somehow, even though its a little messier than I'd like, scary because its unpredictable, and so very different and sounds like a mistake, there's really nowhere else I'd rather be right now.

"..and I still can't believe that you came up to me and said,

'I love you'

I love you too.."

Than here in my room, dreaming about you and me.

Love, Joyce.