Paganism

"..Rockhead smells rich and rare,
like a well-matured piece of cheese.
No baths for Templars.
Hot water is for girls, porridge, and other soft, wet things.
If a Templar wants a bath he can go and stand in the rain.
That's what God put it there for.."

Dear lonely isle,

Now's the time for a little advertising, since christmas is around the corner anyway. *wink* *wink* *nudge* *nudge*

• Once upon a time, there was a book.
• The title was 'Pagan's crusade'.
• God I love that book.
• It's not very thick ~ light reading =)
  
• And the words aren't very small ~ easy on the eyes
• It's filled with sarcasm ~ all the more reason to read it
• And it's not very expensive ~ easy on your wallet
• It's considered a children's book ~ so was anything written by Garth Nix
• It's about a boy called Pagan and his er misadventures when he applies to join the Templars.
• Naturally, after a few pages, he really wished he hadn't. Having to grow a beard overnight might have something to do with it. (or as Pagan puts it, he'll look like one of the godless infidels, and might be mistakenly killed by Lord Roland.)
  
• He is assigned to be a squire to a knight, Lord Roland Roucy De Bram.
• Never have I seen such a good man before. And I mean it, Lord Roland is a good man. There's no other word for someone as noble. (unless you count in 'imbecility'. Nobles tend to think with their honour rather than their brains. But he really is such a good guy. As Pagan puts it, he's so good he doesn't know how to be bad...)
• Pagan on the other hand is not like Lord Roland, or so Lord Roland says (Pagan: *rolling eyes* WOW. What a revelation. ) Truth is, other than both being human and male, Pagan is almost the complete opposite of Lord Roland, and although it doesn't make him a complete scoundrel, nevertheless he has his head more firmly planted in reality rather than somewhere in the heavens. Also, he believes in the ugly side of humanity and is not unwilling to get his hands dirty once in awhile (figuratively speaking).
  
• Pagan has a rough childhood and everything he is today is probably a result of bad upbringing.
  
• Lord Roland was probably raised by Lady Valiant and Lord Noble in the Castle of Chivalry. And his 12 playmates, Truth, Justice, Honour, Patience, Steadfast, Chastity, Good Manners, (and all other manner of good things, I cannot remember them at the moment) etc. And he was probably given a small figurine of Saint George to play with when he was younger.
• He is a kind man, with inhuman patience (anyone is, to put up with Pagan.). Always willing to serve, (though he tends to run away from women, due to his vow of er what again? Poverty? No. Chastity? Isn't that for women? Anyway, some vow which means he can't marry or something...) he looks out for Pagan and really cares for him. (Pagan cares for him too, in a somewhat wayward way...)
• All we need now is for Pagan to be a girl.
• But unfortunately, Pagan is no girl.
• The story is set during the time when Jerusalem was taken by the Muslims.
• Kingdom Of Heaven anyone? To understand the story better, it is best to watch the show. ( Orlando Bloom stars in the show, by the way..)
• And Lord Balian of Ibelin makes an appearance in the book *hehe* (more like holds out against the siege actually, and from the description, he looks nothing like Orlando Bloom..too bad the leper king wasn't mentioned much in the book...I liked him in the show.)
• Apparently there are more books about Pagan to come, and this would be the first of four books.

You might want to give it a try.
Unless you don't understand sarcasm.

love, joyce.